In this life we will have critics.

You have an idea you’re excited to share with the world. It might be a book, a business, a sketch, a non-profit, a song. You craft it. You’re about to share it with the world. But then you remember them…the critics. 

Critics are people who close doors by focusing on what’s wrong. A critic is someone with a posture of judgement. Their tone feels dismissive. Their words shut down dialogue. It feels like the critic’s goal is to win an argument or expose us as failures.

Btw: Critics are not to be confused with a questioner. A questioner comes with a posture of curiosity. The questioner may be confused, but their posture is open to dialogue. Questioners may point out what’s wrong but they want the conversation to continue.

Here are five ways I’ve responded to my own critics:

Don’t Put Logs on the Fire

According to Adam Mastoianni we only know about several early Christian heresies because Christians wrote against them. Responding to our critics sometimes only promotes their ideas. We just put logs on the fire.

Remind Yourself Having Critics Doesn’t Make You a Failure

Often times after hearing from a critic we feel exposed. But having a critic is not evidence you should stop creating. Even Jesus didn’t win over all 12 of his disciples. You and I are not for everyone.

Let It Hurt

Burying hurt also buries joy. Name the hurt. Let it bleed. Do not get stuck, but do not move on too quickly.

Right Size the Criticism

Criticisms often stand out more than positive impact. Someone once yelled “Larry David, you suck!” at the Seinfeld creator as he was leaving Dodger Stadium. On the ride home all David talked about was the guy who shouted at him. This was despite also receiving a standing ovation from 56,000 Dodger fans that night.

Don’t Change To Avoid Criticism

We cannot control if and why people like us. If we’re going to be rejected they might as well reject the real us, not the us we constructed to win our critics’ approval.

Criticisms are hard. When everyone has a keyboard in their pocket, we hear thoughts that would have better been left in someone’s head. But when the work you’re doing is too important to stay in your head, you’ll hear from critics. 

Whatever you do, don’t give up!